Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Cheating In Love?


William Somerset Maugham once said:

"Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species."          

             Do you remember the love stories your mother told you?  They were so pure and endless….

             Do you remember your dreams about the sweetheart, don't you? 

            And now, what about your love affair? 

           You finally met somebody to love and to cherish.  You dream about the wedding dress, making you a fairytale princess or prince, exciting wonder and admiration of the bridegroom and all the guests, demonstrating your enviable chiselled figure. 

          Have you already thought your future life over?  A country house, three or four lovely babies on the lawn near it?  How to make your still-loving-and-hoping heart forget about it?  

          You are absolutely crushed by the situation.  What is to be done, if your special someone is just cheating on you?  Isn't it better to be in blissful ignorance or to face the problem and tackle it?  It's up to you, but your aching heart is silent. 

           Emotions, nothing but emotions. 

            But what made you sure, that you are cheated on (except the case, when you catch your cheating boyfriend/cheating girlfriend on the scene of crime)?  

           They say, the most tormenting thing in cheating is suspicion.

          What are the signs of cheating? 

          Well, it depends. You have been knowing each other not for the first year, or you're living together for a long time, you know all the habits and tastes of your partner, there's already a lot of routine in the relationships, there's no butterflies in the stomach, and you don't even remember how it felt in the beginning. 

         You've been feeling very comfortable, but suddenly you may find out that something doesn't seem right or just different. In fact that's the sign number one. So is he/she cheating on you?

          Being too suspicious isn't right either. But there are some signs of a cheating partner that are quiet obvious. Yes, it's the lipstick on the shirts, cheeks or anywhere else, smell of  perfume, which is not yours, slim cigarettes or any other things forgotten in the car, whispering  in the cell-phone talks, the unknown phone numbers or even addresses, notes, letters, e-mails, sms, extra-work, extra-miles, odd explanations of the absence or phone switched off, strange credit cart receipts, and on and on.

         Are there any special signs of cheating? What makes us suspect?  Less attention and time devoted to us?  Or visa versa,as if your partner is redressing a wrong?  More care about he/her himself/herself?  New sexy wear? Strange smell?  Alien things? Have you noticed some coldness in relationships? Absence of love feeling?

         Cheating partners always do show those signs in behavior in more or less obvious way. A cheating girlfriend can start a sudden diet or go to a fitness club, go on buying and buying new clothes, probably of a more sexy style than usually. A cheating boyfriend may not be going crazy about his appearance as women do, but still can show more attention to what he looks like.

           Changing habits, tastes, which have been the same for years, point on cheating partners also very distinctly. Also cheating may start with paying attention to the things they never cared about or were interested in. But that doesn't always mean that he or she is cheating. That's the sign of some strong influence of any kind from the outside. 

           Changes in the relationships between the partners should make anyone become aware of that something's happening. Cheating partners may become more attentive and nice, or, on the contrary, indifferent and aggressive; they can start giving sudden gifts trying to decrease the guilt they feel inside; or they can find permanent faults in the behavior of their second halves, blaming in such a on them their own relations on the side.

              All these give heartache, and pain, and suffering…  Your heart will tell you.  Do you hesitate if it's right to ask bluntly?  Talk to your partner. Then take a decision. 

            Can we explain cheating partners?  Why?  Is your cheating boyfriend is crazy about beautiful women? Is he a primitive womanizer?  Or, maybe, cheating partners are getting fed up with the present way of life and looking for the new?  The beginning of your love story is the most important phase.  

            Did your partner tell you about his love of seducing, or you planned your future family life together?  Here is the core of the problem.  Maybe, you were so carried away by your dreams, that didn't want to hear about his desire to be free? 

           How not to drive yourself and your partners to cheating? 

            It's well-known that any problem is easier to prevent, than to solve its consequences.  What kills your feelings?  Love is wonderful, but it has to be given much more than that, when two people live together.  And only you have to find some way out of the situation. 

          The basis to the relationship must be 100 % trust in each others love.  So, respect your partners wishes and interests.  Give him/her a bit of liberty.  Do not dissolve in your partner totally and absolutely. Have your own occupations and interests. With love there should never be such a word as habit.  To find the right person who is 100 % physically and mentally attractive  is like finding a diamond in a mountain of sand.  
  
            Treasure him/her!  Never take the person you love for granted!  Try to brighten his/her day with a word, a kiss, making love on the spur of the moment.  Be fabulous and exciting, loving and wise. 

           Perhaps one day, you will find a groovy kind of love. 



P/S

To you whom I haven't met yet, I really believe that before you and me bump to each other in future, we were half a person. You know there is an old myth about people being half and the other half being in the sky, or in the heaven, or on the other side of the universe, or perhaps just a mirror image. But for me, we are two halves, and together we're a whole. That's what I feel about us. 

Dear someone, I have been waiting for you for quite a long time. But don't be sad, don't be afraid. Deep in my heart, I will wait for you to appear in my life one day. There was an old saying by a Greek philosopher that I quote, true love is like a blossoming lavender, it is a long wait, but when it blossomed, you will enjoy the air of serenity and love within it. How I wish that quote can be translated into real life.

For the other half of the sky that I haven't met yet, the moment you click into this letter, kept that in your heart that I had fallen in love with you way before we met each other in real life. For that my special someone, you and me, we shared a groovy kind of love together. 

With love,
Half Moon Serenades.


       

2 comments:

ABoyNamedXander said...

amazing! love this post..

cheating partners said...

A marriage isn't fine if one of you have cheated because for me happily married people don't cheat. He made a choice to hurt you and his family. Therefore, it's good to call it quits unless he changes his bad actions and prove to you that he's very sorry.